Hey There Delilah & Signal Fire

I know it is uncharacteristic of me to introduce a song that has no significant meaning to me, but sometimes, I think I should descend from my pedestal of profound choices and be amongst the prosaic and shallow. Today is the day. =)

Well, this is one of those that are pleasant to the ear but will not feature in any American Idols soon due to its lack of technicality. No matter. I’m being simple today. At least this band, Plain White T’s, is obscure enough to merit a mention here.

Anyway, I chose not to include the lyrics here, mainly because it does not reflect an emotion or a situation or a phase I am in like the rest. So don’t bother analysing the song trying to grasp some cryptic message I am sending out, unlike the others.

Since I have already acted atypically from my usual nature, I might as well share the videos that are against my norm. This is sort of a promo for one of the blockbuster summer movies this year, which I personally think is cool. Being accompanied by Snow Patrol does not hurt too. =)

The Renunciation

Pardon the double entry, but I hereby renege my previous declarations for platitudes of affections towards my family. I realize that this is an un-Christianly act to follow, but no person who publicly shamed or undermined me deserves any offers of adoration from me.

If I am able, I will not cease to honour my parents and hold my biting tongue behind my clenched teeth, effectively reining in the cutting remarks unlike my favoured brother. Yet, do not expect me to obligingly execute assigned tasks any longer like the dutiful son I was.

It is true that I have not pursued to please others zealously like my counterparts before and aimed to chart my own paths. Still, the lack of appreciation for experimentation and individuality does not absolve preferential treatments nor the disparaging of anything remotely associated to me.

Alas, this is nothing but the markings of a bitter man over things trivial and inconsequential with the passing of years to come. I just hope that this is somewhat therapeutic both as a constructive cathartic release as well as a distraction when sleep does not take me in.

The Predicament

For the casual readers of this online compositions as well as the acquaintances of mine who did not know better, I was born as the eldest to a cosy (read: small) nucleus family, which managed to retain a close relationship with my extended families. Like many other stereotypical Chinese family, respect is held at the highest regards among its other morality kin. That means greetings must precede most familiar activities such as arrivals, communal meals and departures.

Typical, is it not? It has always been the custom that is inherited from generations to generations so I have never given a second thought about it. So fortunately - or unfortunately depending on how you look at it - I recently was exposed to a family that does not share a similar admiration for respect, and instead put ‘love’ as the forerunning quality on the pedestal of values. That discovery and an episode of soap operas too many.

It does not matter too much, right? Especially since ideals are intangible anyway? I would have agreed, if I did not notice an integral difference in our habits. Sure, the actual full blown shouting, arguments and curses with elders is hard to stomach for the naïve me, but what I truly admire is the ease and blasé manner love towards others is shared and spoken of.

It is true; I believe that such a wonderful phenomenon like love should not be expressed through mere fleeting words alone. Instead, love should be conveyed with both subtle caring behaviours and dramatic affectionate deeds. Such demeanour appears so much more significant; yet I admit the latter is a considerably longer process and the ease of misinterpretation is astounding.

I think the kicker to my adoption of this belief came when a significant person of mine summoned immeasurable courage and confided in me regarding the lack of appreciation that is felt. How easy it is to avoid situations like this if the three simple words were repeated more often?

Since it is Father’s day - although I will still do this on any other commemorative dates - I wonder: how I can effusively express my gratitude and *gasp* love for a family member sincerely, without scaring them into thinking that I’m at the brink of suicide for this suddenly change?