I am a Rock

Thank God it’s Friday!

Even though it wasn’t that bad this week, the allure of a weekend of rest and recuperation cannot be denied. In addition to that, the promise of fellowship and games, albeit most likely without an important ingredient, is more reason to shout this phrase at the top of a corporate slave’s lungs. I think I just frightened a colleague of mine who unwittingly passed by my desk. It must be a creepy sight, with me and my bloodshot eyes mumbling to myself to savour these words.

In retrospect, despite the implications with my song choices this whole week, it has been a great week for me. This auspicious beginning of the month bodes a smooth journey ahead since these seven days bore witness to many significant events: the advancement in my career-actualization, my rekindling of treasured friendships, the initiation of surprising new ones, and not forgetting the strengthening of existing brotherhood bonds. Quite a mouthful, huh? Quite a week too. =)

Now that I have finally sat down and think about it, the fantastic week cannot be attributed to the many momentous occurrences, but rather the interaction that I was fortunate enough to have with people across my intimacy scale. I guess it is not a surprise to find me drawn to psychology. As I have told the interviewers, my passion is with people. So, it is ironic for me to find this very week featured an exceptionally higher number of friends who decided to go into a recluse.

Surprisingly, I understand the mindset of each individual who chose this lonely path, and it is not all unjustified. Hey, even a popular guy like me went through phases similar to this often enough to empathise. I just hope those who can relate to this post will one day discover the exhilaration of living, and to venture into new (potentially dangerous) territories of meeting people. Until then, I dedicate this song to all you aspiring hermits out there.

I tried searching my memory for more optimistic lyrical content but most have crap poetry. I can only assume that songwriters have to be high or intoxicated to be able to churn out statements reflecting mortal bliss in songs. Thus, credit should be given to one Midnight Angel - who apparently prefer, if not actively seeks isolation too - for introducing this song to me. As can be seen from the clip, today’s song is a ‘classic’, and is therefore beyond my musical knowledge.

The lyrics are straightforward enough, so none of my usual interpretation commentary is needed this time round. Funnily, this video triggers a homophobe side of me that I never knew existed. Maybe it is because this video depicts the ostensibly normal day of two grown men performing frivolous activities we come to expect only in children… or couples trying to be recapture their lost youth. I have nothing against living it up but please, leave that to the kids.

A winter's day
In a deep and dark December
I am alone
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow
I am a rock
I am an island

I've built walls
A fortress deep and mighty
That none may penetrate
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain
I am a rock
I am an island

Don't talk of love
Well, I've heard the word before
It's sleeping in my memory
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died
If I never loved I never would have cried
I am a rock
I am an island

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me
I am shielded in my armour
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb
I touch no one and no one touches me
I am a rock
I am an island

And a rock feels no pain
And an island never cries

Good Life

In a bid to please my faithful Cunctation cohorts’ desire for consistency, I was working through lunch to deliver yet another heart-wrenching entry, deluded that I could finish up before I take my welcomed midday meal break by the second hour. Sure, I was straining my literary capabilities amidst having provocative discussions of religion and vocations, but I must be commended for my dedication and my intellect to produce yet another enjoyable read.

Alas, my time management was betrayed by an unexpected crisis. Why would anyone organize the arrival of trucks that could not shoulder the predetermined capacity? No matter. My dazzling negotiating and delegating skill shone through once again and averted another potential penalty for the company. However, my invaluable expertise came with a price, my own appetite was not fulfilled and you, my friends, know how much I treasure my food.

This calls for a perk today, and what can brighten up my day better than a favourite song? (I can think of a dozen other things that could have but that is not the point.) To those who questioned my sensitivity towards my readers, I DID notice my previous songs posted here depict the more depressing moments of life, complemented by their almost wailing harmonies. Rest be assured, my dear fans, today is different.

Today’s instalment provides a buoyant, if not downright jolly, tune. How couldn’t it, I got it from the series Scrubs. I bet some of you will be swaying to its melody, with a lit up lighter in hand. Having said that, the deeper implications are no less melancholic. Lyrically, it revolves around the ending of a love; resign and bitter, yet still hopeful for the other. So why did I like this song? The turmoil and conflicting emotions, of course. I am a confused young man. =)

Softly now, you owe it to the world
And everyone knows that you're my favourite girl
But there are some things in life that are not meant to be
I'm not meant for you, and you're not meant for me
Here's to our problems and here's to our fights
Here's to our achings and here's to your having...
A good life, from me

Softly now, you owe it to yourself
And don’t think that you will be left on the shelf
’Cause, there's someone for you and there's someone for me
Like me, you'll meet them eventually
Here's to your lover and here's to my wife
Here's to your children and here's to your having...
A good life, from me

Baby, Baby, Baby, Baby, Baby, Baby, Baby, Baby

Loudly now, you've lost all your pain
You're married with children and happy again
Now I'm regretting the moves that I made
Fatal mistakes are so easily made
Enough of my problems they only cause fights
Forget that I rang you and promise that you'll have
Such a beautifully happy and painlessly romantic...
Good life, from me
Good life

Loving the Alien (Sometimes)

A cultured friend of mine once shared that the best songs are sung by rock bands when they opt for a softer style. How I full-heartedly concur! This obscure instalment of the Anthem Anthology possesses a number of concurrent tones: the frustrations of empty promises; the resolution of prevailing over heartaches; and the fragility of emotions after surmounting such obstacles. I can only assume the reference of aliens here denotes to the rebound effect after a separation.

Sometimes I think I'm scared
Sometimes I know
I feel like making love
Sometimes I don't
I feel like letting go
Maybe not
I feel like giving up
Is all we got

Sometimes is all the time
And never means maybe
Sometimes is all the time
Maybe

And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
(Sometimes I feel alone)
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on

Sometimes I make believe
When we're alone
Machines have taken hold
Can you get me to a telephone
It's just the little things
You used to see
Am I still that man who makes you who you want to be

Sometimes is all the time
And never means maybe
Sometimes is all the time
Maybe

And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
(Sometimes I feel alone)
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on

I never noticed
How lovely were the aliens
Lovely were the aliens
I never noticed
How lovely were the aliens
Lovely were the aliens

And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
(Sometimes I feel alone)
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
(Sometimes I feel alone)
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving on
And I'm moving... on

November Rain

Continuing with my old school theme, this song to me is mainly on the understanding that some things take time to nurture, especially something as precious as love. Considered as one of the best song of the century (among all the other soppy ones), I find the conflicting mentalities and theories fascinating. Within a single song, it encourages both wild abandonment as well as the cautious consideration of growth in love.

Guess which approach I am inclined to? I suppose it neatly ties up with a recent quote I chanced upon in my readings: “Some things can’t be planned. They must be lived, in the every changing flow of the moment,” (McKenna, 2003). Some information just comes too late.

I must admit that at first, I do not know what prologue I should provide to precede such a work of art by the legendary Guns ‘n’ Roses. Did quite a job now, have I? Unless, of course, that you find this pretentious artistic interpretation cloyingly charming. Heh. One warning though, it is quite long for the unwary and, as previously said, it is of the old school rock genre that we rarely hear on the airwaves nowadays. I can still hear the Mat Rempits trying to nail the many rifts down. =)

When I look into your eyes I can see a love restrained
But darling when I hold you, don't you know I feel the same
'Cause nothing lasts forever and we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle in the cold November rain

We've been through this such a long, long time
Just trying to kill the pain

But lovers always come and lovers always go
And no one's really sure who's letting go today
Walking away
If we could take the time to lay it on the line
I could rest my head just knowing that you were mine
All mine

So if you want to love me then darling don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walking in the cold November rain

Do you need some time... on your own
Do you need some time... all alone
Everybody needs some time... on their own
Don't you know you need some time... all alone

I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you

Sometimes I need some time... on my own
Sometimes I need some time... all alone
Everybody needs some time... on their own
Don't you know you need some time... all alone

And when your fears subside and shadows still remain
I know that you can love me when there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness, we still can find a way
'Cause nothing lasts forever even cold November rain

Don't you think that you need somebody
Don't you think that you need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

I Started a Joke

Yes, the truth is out. Because of my prudent attempt in my previous post to diffuse any potential lawsuits for indirectly persuading impressionable youngsters to be an IDIOT like me, I unwittingly exposed my diabolical agenda for this blog: this is my endeavour to be funny.

Alas, like most revolutionary geniuses, my words are seemingly devoid of any form of humour whatsoever, considering the hostile responses in the place of laughter (aside from a few polite sniggers) that should have ensued.

Either that, or the world is now bereft of any merriment to comprehend my wit.

Obviously the latter rationale is the more plausible one of the two, and therefore reminded me a classic ballad by the Bee Gees, although not as melodramatic. This is the perfect illustration of how great minds think so much alike, since it was rumoured that this song is inspired by Hitler's ideology (attention G-Sus). Talk about being open minded enough to see past the façades and adopt another's perception!

To those peculiar ones who do not acknowledge the Gibb brothers as one of the musical scene's trend-setters, if not one of the all-time greats, do not hesitate in clicking the 'play' button. This is an old school video when they were still in their harmonic soft rock phase. I must apologize to the shallow MTV generation though, for this clip is not much to look at, especially with the production quality that you are all so used to.

I started a joke, which started the whole world crying,
But I didn’t see that the joke was on me, oh no.

I started to cry, which started the whole world laughing,
Oh, if I’d only seen that the joke was on me.

I looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes,
And I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I’d said.

Till I finally died, which started the whole world living,
Oh, if I’d only seen that the joke was on me.

I looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes,
And I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I’d said.

Till I finally died, which started the whole world living,
Oh, if I’d only seen that the joke was on me.

P.S. Rest in Peace Maurice. You are still remembered.

Dissolved Girl

How do you know you are in love?

Does one reason from the mind's constant lingering on the pined?
Does one relate the butterflies within? Or the comfort and security?
Does one describe how special that someone feels? Or how we do?
Does one narrate the physical reactions? Or the intellectual impression?
Does one elucidate the emotional sensations? Or the spiritual sentience?

Because I am. With her.

Shame, such a shame
I think I kind of lost myself again
Day, yesterday
Really should be leaving but I stay
Say, say my name
I need a little love to ease the pain
I need a little love to ease the pain
It's easy to remember when it came

'Cause it feels like I've been
I've been here before
You are not my saviour
But I still don't go
Feels like something
That I've done before
I could fake it
But I still want more

Fade, made to fade
Passion's overrated anyway
Say, say my name
I need a little love to ease the pain
I need a little love to ease the pain
It's easy to remember when it came

'Cause it feels like I've been
I've been here before
You are not my saviour
But I still don't go, oh
I feel live something
That I've done before
I could fake it
But I still want more, oh.

P.S. Can someone decipher this code and interpret the song? All I know is that I like it. =)