The Predicament

For the casual readers of this online compositions as well as the acquaintances of mine who did not know better, I was born as the eldest to a cosy (read: small) nucleus family, which managed to retain a close relationship with my extended families. Like many other stereotypical Chinese family, respect is held at the highest regards among its other morality kin. That means greetings must precede most familiar activities such as arrivals, communal meals and departures.

Typical, is it not? It has always been the custom that is inherited from generations to generations so I have never given a second thought about it. So fortunately - or unfortunately depending on how you look at it - I recently was exposed to a family that does not share a similar admiration for respect, and instead put ‘love’ as the forerunning quality on the pedestal of values. That discovery and an episode of soap operas too many.

It does not matter too much, right? Especially since ideals are intangible anyway? I would have agreed, if I did not notice an integral difference in our habits. Sure, the actual full blown shouting, arguments and curses with elders is hard to stomach for the naïve me, but what I truly admire is the ease and blasé manner love towards others is shared and spoken of.

It is true; I believe that such a wonderful phenomenon like love should not be expressed through mere fleeting words alone. Instead, love should be conveyed with both subtle caring behaviours and dramatic affectionate deeds. Such demeanour appears so much more significant; yet I admit the latter is a considerably longer process and the ease of misinterpretation is astounding.

I think the kicker to my adoption of this belief came when a significant person of mine summoned immeasurable courage and confided in me regarding the lack of appreciation that is felt. How easy it is to avoid situations like this if the three simple words were repeated more often?

Since it is Father’s day - although I will still do this on any other commemorative dates - I wonder: how I can effusively express my gratitude and *gasp* love for a family member sincerely, without scaring them into thinking that I’m at the brink of suicide for this suddenly change?

Toxic

A mere two days have since passed, yet cries for my next entry rings through the lands already. It is my fault for creating such high expectations among my many readers with my writing frequency here, and for that I apologize for the apprehension caused. No, I was not killed in a horrific motor vehicle accident (yet). No, I was not abducted by seductive beauties eager to share my bed. And no, I was not bedded by an infectious venereal disease, too sick for another provocative entry.

Instead, my next Anthem Anthology feature encountered a setback since iMEEM did not boast an extensive selection, especially with the exclusion of such profound pieces of work. Rest assured though, for this inept internet junkie expended a considerable amount of time and amended this dreadful predicament finally, painstakingly uploaded the latest song intended for the next chapter of AA while sharing it with the deprived.

Either way, this delay is a blessing in disguise since then I was able to fully appreciate the gravity of such intricacies. Misinterpretations of intention are rife nowadays with the current complexity of language, where simple words can be mere gestures of jest to some as well as awkward sexual innuendos to others. In situations like these, should we seek for clarification and risk potential embarrassment or simply brush off the comments and ignore the whole dilemma altogether?

This song is an apt reminder of our callousness with words, and how an injudicious statement can hurt keener than the sharpest splinter. Worse, slights can fester and corrupt the soul; changing lives, burning bridges.

But enough philosophies on a Saturday, you probably already know this. Just enjoy the song.

Sticks and stones may break my bones
But words can burn a happy home, it's true
I've got words for you

The past is done it's gone forever
Don't tell me my pain is pleasure
You, you haven't got a clue

Oh, I wanna cry but I don't make a sound
I'm your child and your child is feeling down
Everybody’s toxic in this town

All gods children fade and die
In the name of lets get high
And then, we do it again

I pray the lord, my soul to keep
That when you coming down I'll be asleep
I can't pretend, it's killing me again

Oh, I wanna cry but I don't make a sound
I'm your child and your child is feeling down
Everybody’s toxic in this town

Call me in my lord I'm coming down
(Coming down)
Call me in my lord I'm coming down

Oh, I wanna cry but I don't make a sound
I'm your child and your child is feeling down
Everybody’s toxic in this town

Oh, I wanna cry but I don't make a sound
I'm your child and your child is feeling down
Everybody’s toxic in this town

Sticks and stones may break my bones
But words can burn a happy home, it's true
I've got words for you

Overkill

When engulfed in a wave of melancholy like I did, typically people will resort to alcohol or drugs to temporarily ease the aching, constantly chasing the high. To my concerned friends, fret not. I am still very much straight edge. Instead of travelling the substance dependency path, I am indulging to more family-oriented escapism: TV series. What better series than a parody of working life in a hospital? Scrubs to the rescue!

Hence, as can be seen in the following clip, today’s Anthem is featured in one of Scrubs’ episode.

How anyone can stay depressed after watching this baffles me.

What some do not know is that this is actually an oldie, but not old enough to have its own music video in MTV nonetheless. Now the ‘extra’ lyrics make more sense. =) Check out Colin Hay back then. Anyway, to me this song talks about the tendency of most of us to exaggerate our problems and overanalyzing trifling details to justify our emotions. With that, I suppose we should follow the advice in Verse 2 too, and break the monotony sometimes; like enjoying this video. =D

I cant get to sleep
I think about the implications
Of diving in too deep
And possibly the complications

Especially at night
I worry over situations
I know will be alright
Perhaps its just imagination

Day after day it reappears
Night after night my heartbeat, shows the fear
Ghosts appear and fade away

Alone between the sheets
Only brings exasperation
It’s time to walk the streets
Smell the desperation

At least there’s pretty lights
Although there’s little variation
It nullifies the night
From overkill

Day after day it reappears
Night after night my heartbeat, shows the fear
Ghosts appear and fade away
Come back another day

I cant get to sleep
I think about the implications
Of diving in too deep
And possibly the complications

Especially at night
I worry over situations
I know will be alright
Its just overkill

Day after day it reappears
Night after night my heartbeat, shows the fear
Ghosts appear and fade away
Ghosts appear and fade away
Ghosts appear and fade away